Saturday. 1.24.04 2:22 pm mood: fuck you
listening to: bob marley's greatest hits
watching: the time slip by
aye fuck you buddy
....thats all i wanna say today later Comment! (0) | Recommend! Tuesday. 1.20.04 2:01 am watching: YOU!
listening to: (dont think they have a name yet) - Awesome
mood: like a nickelodeon marathon of "All that"
tactical strike 1 baby bombs over baghdad !!1
well... dont ask me what that was about if you werent there fuck you... i gotta list of things to say but i probably wont go past 3 because somethings arent meant to be shared...
werid things happen on friday-sunday, ...let me explain, everytime me and reggie hang out on a saturday, we are put in a position that ultimately could lead into sexual intercourse with the oposite sex of your preference... lots of big words not sure they mean what i do, but we get hit on ALOT... no idea why, but the women just keep coming... never it fails to be as such
for example... on this last saturday we found ourselves in a hot tub with 4 women.. not at alowed to say what happened saturday night with me and reggie but we now take bail money with us everytime we go outside together because something is bound to add up.
but anyways... havent written here for awhile as u might alrdy have known ive been absent of the internet (abstinet) for a few weeks and its been good lemme tell you good sir/maam/or vestie... i wanna go bowling but nobody else does so that idea is dead in the water actually i might go bowling alone.. i really wanna try my idea of wearing SHITTY ass shoes from like the 3rd grade and trade them in with the bowling shoes and just keeping the bowling shoes ... cuz fuck them! thats why.. i thought i had a wart on my big toe but it was nothing... gone the next day... =] ... i feel satisfactory the weridness is gone replaced by ominous women i think
Carolina won HAHHA WOOOOTY
if you goto my school you may have had to take a test that is supposed to show you who you are sexually compatable with... FUCK THAT... im not letting some machine tell me who the fuck to marry LOL fuck that dood i know exactly who im looking for just havent found it yet.. someone who isnt affraid to talk to someone who may possibely be crazy/insane or at least not dress with a color-code.. and she doesnt have to have that big ass as long as we fuckin connect and are attracted to each other thats the only thing important to me.. in actulae i like fat ladies really... not excessively fat but WELL-PROPORTIONED =] and anyways... ill tell you what she looks like when i find her ... till then couldnt say soo ima enjoy them all.. but shit 2 dollars to get a machine's opinion isnt my style.. ill take these two bucks and meet her at the "AM-PM" down the street =A
ahah u know your shit out of luck when your history teacher tells you that you cant make it this semister just wait till next time to pass ... now tell me if that is fucked up or what... opinions are welcome
im going to petco soon.. gonna buy a plant and name it woot or maybe like a fish or snail or somethin havent decided yet but i think i need a fish in my life do you agree? doesnt matter..
check it
 Comment! (0) | Recommend! its beginning to look a lot like Wednesday. 12.31.03 4:41 am well.. it snowed today.. made the biggest snowman on teh block.. pretty sad when ur competing with the 8 yr old girl across the street... but the bitch wouldnt stop rolling her base.. so we couldnt back down!.. anyways it was a fun night.. had a lot of fun playin like i was tony montana from scarface... SAY HELLO TO MY LIL FRIEND! even tried to sniff the snow.. cuz it looked like cocaine! WAHHH hahah i was laughing as the blood poured out of my nose! jk.. i wasnt laughing...  i was trippin out!
we were gonna go bowling but i didnt wanna pay so i waited till today an we are goin to go tonight hopefuly my moms will pay! OH YA played the system.. i dont bowl too much but its pretty fun.. i used to go down to the alley a lot and after the game i would play missle command cuz they have that up there.. missile command is probably the best game ever made.. second to none!
i still havent seen my dad so i havent given him my christmas gift yet... we will see how that goes.. but i got a deck of the "iraq's most wanted" playing cards... SWEEET ive been wanting them for awhile... my cell phone just stoped working all the sudden dunno what happened to it but whateva..
im tring to get my sleep schedule together here.. as of writing this semi-sentince its 4:52... ive always had trouble sleeping.. but when i do u cant wake me up im like a rock... grrr my moms alarm clock is goin off but she wont wake up and turn it off -.- and she complains about meh! WHATEVER .. im out... Comment! (3) | Recommend! Sunday. 12.28.03 12:49 am HELL YES... soo happy... found out my brother mike just got into University of Washington Business and he is out partying now WOOOTY... LOVEn' MeH BrOthEr Bear
Congrats to my big brother Mike love ya
Me, Reggie, Tomson Lee, Jay went to the mall the today... Anthony Frizzini was busy... Ash bailed on us cuz he was playing Final Fantacy phesh PUNK! WHATEVER! Ryan Archer.... knew the answer shouldnt even have asked he never hangs out with us anymore.. and we were gonna ask more ppl but nobody was online/home so sorry if i couldnt get a hold of u.. LOOSERS! HAH! jk! LOVE MEH!
saw a car in my dreams... actually it was really awesome i saw it in a magizine and just fuckin had a wet dream right there!... something i will probably try to buy one of these days... need to land my first job tho and i think i will soon... im gonna be a safeway bagger ! SWEEET i know i know... thats what i said
GOOD TIMES.. man im having a blast now.. was tired with family and stuff.. but never felt better and today prooves that.. god soo happy for my bro.. man he deserves this more than any other person i know... thats the truth
Sister is all alone in hawaii now with a baby in teh tummy.. she had to spend her christmas there alone and she comfirmed it.. it was extra gay.. Jason (her husband) had to goto maryland or somewhere for some reason i was too tired to understand.. but she is fine... fine enough to lecture me on life.. she is the coolest tho.. she is gonna make a bitchin momacita and its a girl too soo we will see how that goes love/wishes to my big sis michelle
           OMG ITS FELIX THE CAT!!!!!!!! WTF I LOVE NUTANG EVEN MORE NOW  thats me! haha =] LIVE ON MY HOMIES IM OUT NOW! bye Comment! (2) | Recommend! Family/Holidays/Military - Fuck em all Friday. 12.26.03 7:16 pm lol lots of family problems got brought up yesterday on christmas lol my bad for the big long post and all but it just got to me..
but i just realized there is nothing sad about my post last night... and thats good cause im really not sad at all.. i had a good christmas but it started off slow... we didnt get our tree till like 2 days b4 christmas... its fake but thats fine with me.. the trees always pissed me off every year and im not sure why...
Family came down.. thats always trouble.. my mothers mom came out and whoa they still fight like every day over STUPID STUPID STUPID shit... about 6 months ago she came out.. and we all played "risk" the board game ( a game about world domination ).. that game is not a family game let me tell u.. stuff comes out from like 20 years back lol
ROFL me and my cousns were laughing our asses off too... oh well somethings never change its nice to know that now.. 2 years ago.. i might of been mad that they are fighting still.. but some people dont even vent it out.. they never even see eachother any more ... thats just sad to me but oh well what can u do?
presents i didnt get exactly what i wanted but i got a big tv instead.. which is nice.. still not what i needed tho... i wanted this book called "how to be a villian" it looks good.. i got a lot of stuff i was just dazed by all that was goin on it didnt really matter much to me.. still a lot better than some people got so im thankful for that..
the holidays always bring greif in some way or fasion... like stress.. but this year i didnt have a lot on my mind.. just kinda walkin around with my head floating behind me.. maybe im gettin too much sleep or something im not as relaxed as i am usually its kinda bothering everyone around me even my friends are like "what the hell is goin on with u?".. but really they can go fuck themselves cuz i feel fine... werid but fine.. and it just makes me wanna know why i feel soo werid lately when they ask stupid shit like that.. so screw em.. I am moving to federal way for sure now... almost had to go over-seas for another tour for the damn military.. but my mom's boss sent somebody else.. and i didnt ever wanna go overseas untill... untill i couldnt go any more... you know what i mean?.. i used to live in england and that was soo much fun.. everything is different... milk comes like everyother day.. they drop it on the front step of your door.. so if u run out of milk for cereal u can always go steal some from ppl next door! =P had some good times.. and a part of me died when i found out we werent goin somewhere new.. cuz ive moved around all my life.. this is the longest ive ever lived in one spot..
i had a good christmas... lots of fucked up things... but i wouldnt trade it for the world.. i just look at the bad parts and say at least thats over with
drivin to the store now cuz my mom has yelled at me to get ready 3 times and i still havent answered her yet =]... hope everyone's christmas was at least as good as mine Comment! (0) | Recommend! thoughts and feelings racing my mind at 5 AM Friday. 12.26.03 5:15 am ( ps havent slept y try sleeping upside down or sideways tonight...
in a spot u usually wouldnt be in... it sounds kinky and werid, but everytime i do this i "feelin like a million bucks"... like im trying new things and even if i dont like it... i can say that ive tryed it. Its just like ugly/nasty food, when ur parents ask u if u wanna try it... and you dont so u say u have alrdy tried it and this shits nasty as hell.. at least then uve tried it, u gave it a chance.. it didnt work... soo what?.. u know it doesnt and u wont ever have to go back there again!... its probably one of my favorite feelings.. trying new things....
Ever steaked down the street naked?.. i did when i was 14, as a dare in truth or dare... glad as hell i did it too.. its a werid feeling... first ur like oh shit i hope nobody sees me... then ur like.. ya u dumbass.. hell ya their gonna see me... wonder what they'll think... then ur like ..no... fuck them i dont give a shit what they say... and u run out there.. dick flopin thru the air.. but u know what? u never felt better.. cuz u feel soo free... and it doesnt matter how many people laugh... cuz fuck if they'll ever try it... i sound like a hippe and im using too many "..." but FUCK the system.. FUck whats normal and right to do... ima try new things from here on out ... the rest of my life... till i die.. ill never run out of new things to try...
why? because its a goal ill probably never complete, its a test never to be finished... but still a test and if i never complete it... ill never be finished in life.. even after im dead.. it gives me a meaning in life... a purpose.. one day i got to a point where i didnt wanna wake up.. because i had no real purpose in life.. i got up went to school.. talked.. failed a class.. got yelled at.. and went back to sleep... i felt good when i was asleep... cuz nobody could touch me... but then i was awoken.. its like god shakin a toy in front of a baby then pullin it away.. u get to rest now.. but u have to wake up.. and you dont even control when u wake up.. u never get to play or have the toy untill u die.. so i felt like i needed to just wake up forever and find something to throw myself at.. a dream to focus on indirectly.. ill live my life too, but on the way.. ima try everything i can just to see if i like it or hate it... when u get to this certain point in life.. u wouldnt mind dying right then an there.. u try everything to take a hold of situations and family fights.. but nobody listens to u... ur just there and too young to matter.. AND I HATE THAT FUCKING FEELING.. cuz u know what... every one has a voice... parents that have kids and dont listen to their words.. FUCK YOU i hate you i hope ur kids grow up to make a million bucks and never buy or talk to u again... learn lessons for themselves.. cuz u werent there for them... you had the nerve to give life to someone.. but not acknowledge their minds... thats why when i have kids im gonna listen to them... even when they say the most fucking messed up fairy tale story and ask if i wanna go "fly" or something... know what im gonna say? YES... im gonna say yes... not only that but im gonna go outside with them and help them fly... just because their ideas arent perfect... they have A LOT to learn... but how will they learn if they feel NOBODY will listen?
This is how i felt till i was 10 years old.. when i turned into such a rebel my dad couldnt hold me back any more.. i seized life by the fucking hair and pulled it where i wanna go.. after my parents split up and my mom had to move away because the military made her... i had to live with my dad and his New wife... shit i hate saying step mom cuz she doesnt know shit... she isnt my mother.. fuck her.. fuck her... FUCK HER.. she is such a bitch... man... if i had a gun i might have killed her.. at this time i got into a lot of shit.. moved into a BAD neighborhood in tacoma... hung out with the wrong ppl... and started a lot of trouble for myself.. but i learned a lot of shit... ill never forget.. like greed money power and everything that follows... life cant be the same when u live soo close to bs like that... you learn stuff you never would have tho.. and a part of me is happy i lived in the bad side of town for awhile... REALLY HAPPY.. becuse ppl that hide themselves from pain will only get shocked and hurt more when they face it... AND THEY WILL FACE IT... because thats one thing u cant run from ...pain.. because its everywhere waiting for you to not be ready
Then shit keeps comin up... u realize that u wont ever control certain things... so u gotta be like water.. always ready for change... never get mad at change.. because mad people are cold.. and cold water becomes ice.. and ice doesnt move and change as water does.. it just sits their... and get colder and colder.. i can think of 3 times when i wanted to kill myself soo bad but i had heard a song that made me realize suiside was simply the EASY way out and that to accept change and move on takes a much smarter/stronger man... think about it... to overcome without having any control from the start is something to marvel at.. to give up and kill urself because u thought u came up short is a waste of life... its a weakness i would never want to bare
but then what is the point of life if not to die... and what better way to die than by your own hands?... nobody can say for sure which would be better... because the question is soo extreme that to find the answer means u could never tell anyone about it... soo why try to find the answer? just live life to the fullest and know that u tried the most you could before you died.. living your life like this i dont see how you could have any regrets.. OR you could just make your own death... find something you hate about yourself like being gullible ( something im proud to say im not ).. and take it away... never admit to it.. never yeild to it.. never accept it... just always fight it.. untill it dies.. then at least your making yourself better the rest of your life right?
then i think ill acomplish somethin for myself.. striving for big goals is what its all about.. because that shit makes or breaks a person.. if u have a HUGE goal, u think ur never gonna complete... it'll run on ur brain that u never will, thats where u test yourself to the limits, and u find no limits, because as long as u push yourself higher you'll never feel like u cant go higher... the brain tells the body to stop... but if the brain tells the body to keep goin the body cant argue can it?.. you control your brain.. so whatever you do... do it with boundless enthusiasm and know every day ur gonna wake up and find a better way to do things... or not... or totally not.. but at least ur gonna try and if shit hits the fan, than buy febreze man
its this outlook on life soo wreckless and insane that it just works for me..
what do i mean?... i have no idea... but leave a comment if u like!  ( god i want an afro ) Comment! (1) | Recommend! | 
